A Letter From The Heart

My Dearest
  I have changed. You are right, it is me who has changed more than you have. I feel stronger and know my heart and mind better lately. You are partly responsible. You helped me find a place and way to heal. Now you are feeling punished for it. For that I am sorry. I do not want you to be something you are not or feel things you don't already. You have said that I shouldn't assume you don't feel all the things I say I would love to have you feel, that you do but don't say them, it's not your way, to be wordy.
I have come to realize I deserve to be loved, I am good enough and worthy of real, true, deep and lasting love. I deserve to be cherished and allowed to cherish in return. I have the right to be safe and respected. I want to feel special and wanted. I want to give my heart and soul to you. I want to take care of you and be taken care of by you. I want us to lean on each other in the pain life deals and laugh together from the joys of life.
I want you to be happy and feel fulfilled in something since your job leaves you so frustrated & empty. I know I can't fill all of your needs but I will help you find the things you need to make you happy, feel relaxed and find your joy. I promise you a lifetime of tomato soup with grilled cheese sandwiches, coffee, whisky & diet coke, hair rubs, Friday night pushing off the bed, side cracks and to always love 90's music with you.
In return I just ask you to try and step out of your comfort zone and tell me a little more often the things you feel but assume I know. Share what you feel in your heart in a way I will understand, in words..from time to time...And forever continue to be my bestie!!!

I love you and thank you for the past (almost) 15 years..the good and bad (yes even the bad because they make the good so much more..well, good)